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I am not very good at this blogging thing.

It is all the small things I see and experience here that I want to be remembering, but I never seem to get around to recording any of them.

I read other people’s writing and become disheartened, wishing that I could express myself with the same elegance.  I’m sure I’d have quite a story if I could.

I should, i suppose, be writing more rather than less, just in case it is something that can come with practice.

The wind is absolutely howling at the moment, which is a rare occurrence in Hefei.  I think there is a storm on the way.  No better time, I guess, to sit down and write something.

Chandler and I just went for a lively walk around the lake as the wind blew our hair in every direction.  Chandler had a wonderful time, it was just like sticking his head out the car window and being able to run and pee on things all at the same time.

As we walked past the path to our building, one of my neighbours called down from her balcony.  We have met a few times and she is always very sweet to me even though she doesn’t speak a word of English and I am always too shy to speak any Chinese.

Her nightdress was threatening to blow up over her head at any moment as she cheerily yelled down for me to come inside quickly as the rain was on its way.

We have such a warm and friendly community atmosphere here.  If only I could work out how to use my oven, I think I would make her a cake.

I’ve just signed myself up for an Amazon.com account.

I’ve no idea if books sent to our address written in English will make it here, but I am getting rather desperate.

I survived in Japan by borrowing books from other teachers’ collections, but having no English speaking friends or colleagues here makes that just a little difficult in Hefei.

In Melbourne I worked part time at the local libraries whenever I had spare time or felt the need for some extra cash, so always had access to an endless supply of reading material.

FREE reading material.

What a luxury!

Scanning through the books on Amazon, trying to calculate shipping cost, wondering how long I will have to wait for my purchases (up to 40 days they say) and if they will ever even find their way here, is bringing me to realise how bloody wonderful the library really is.

It is unimaginable to me now that I could put a few (or 20) books on hold online, then just wander down to pick them up when they arrived at my branch the next day, not paying a cent for any of them.

Sigh.

My computer passed away quietly and unexpectedly during the night last night.

I think I may have caused this disaster by spending the week thinking about backing up all my photos but not actually doing it.

Patrick has booked him into the Sony service centre tomorrow, I hope something can be done!

Prayers for my little Vaio please.

My day began a difficult one.

We still have hoards of tradesmen (and women..) traipsing through the apartment at unexpected times.

Today I was feeling ill and the weather was warm and muggy, not really a day that would put me in the best mood to begin with, then the tradesmen (and women) arrived.

Whenever a new trades-person (that’s the word I was after..) arrives, they tend to be a little overwhelmed by my presence and stand about and stare for a few minutes before getting on with their work. One man got such a surprise when I opened the door one day that his jaw actually dropped and he stood in the doorway for a least a minute unable to move.

When we get the same trades-people back a few days in a row, they tend to not notice me so much and I can blend back into my sofa and not be stared at.

Today I met the most irritating woman yet, who refused to give up the staring for the entire afternoon. If the stares were followed by smiles, I might be able to deal with them a little better, but this was definitely not a friendly stare.

I washed the dishes under her surveillance, then put on a load of washing while she silently examined my every move. I sat at my computer with my headphones and pretended she wasn’t there as she peered over my shoulder.

I tried a bit of staring back but just got caught in a very long mutual stare that I decided was even less comfortable than the one sided one. I stomped about and slammed a few doors, all to no avail.

Eventually I retreated to my room, closed the door and refused to come out until she was gone.

As I hid in my room I wondered if I was overreacting by being really angry with this woman, or if it was fair enough behaviour in a city like Hefei and I should just learn to deal with it.

I still haven’t quite worked out if staring is considered as rude to Chinese as it is to an Australian. If it isn’t, then I really do have to just deal with it, as I can’t possibly go about pushing all my expectations on everyone else.

THAT would be rude.

I have been looking up information on Jiu Hua mountain this evening as Ashley and Ches are arriving tomorrow and I want to be at least a reasonable guide.

Jiu Hua mountain is one of the four sacred Buddhist mountains in China, so information on the area often includes information on Buddhism.

Here I found the four noble truths of Buddhism and my answer to my staring-trades-person problem.

The third noble truth (cessation of suffering is attainable) held my answer. We attain the end of suffering by abandoning our expectations of how things should be. Ha! kind of what I had planned, it must be the way to go.

I must now lower my expectations so much I will be pleasantly surprised daily by my trades-people when they arrive and don’t do anything positively revolting.

Wish me luck!

I’m not a teacher.

I never trained to be one, I never planned to be one.

Because I was born in Australia, I have an automatic ticket to teach English in various places around the globe. This gives me an excellent opportunity to live in places like Hefei and Tokyo without having to do any real hard work, which I am glad for, but I don’t want to actually BE a teacher.

I get stopped in the street and asked to teach people’s children, which is somewhat reasonable, but I have also had strangers appear at my apartment door pushing their rather reluctant children into my home… not quite so reasonable.

I don’t dislike teaching in itself, although it is probably at the bottom of my list of jobs I would wish to do again. I just dislike the assumption that I am white, and in China, so that’s what I do.

I really am much more useful to the world doing what I am qualified to do and actually really enjoy doing… at the moment, I am feeling just a little bit used…